Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Hello. Again.

Hello. Again. 

It has been almost six months since I wrote anything on this blog. Six months of life has come and gone. Winter and the new year, gave way to spring and the busyness of life. Now, here we are sitting on the cusp of June and summer vacation. I let the blog go for awhile because I began to feel that whatever I was saying just didn't seem important anymore. I had nothing exciting to say or share. I was feeling sorry for myself. Our house buying mission had stalled out, dailiness of life ticked by, and I felt like the blog had lived out its life. I think the bigger problem is that I began to compare my life to other people and their lives. They may be having babies, moving, traveling, or homeschooling and I wasn't doing any of those things. I fell victim to the comparison monster. 

However, just recently I had a change of heart. A come to Jesus moment if you will. We had placed an offer on a home that we found out had many little problems that would be big problems later on. Even all the pretty appliances, paint, and fancy counters could not cover up our growing sense of weariness when it came to this home. We walked away. We picked up our pride about homeownership and what we "should" be doing and made a run for it. After many late night and early morning talks, my husband and I decided that we wanted more than just a house in a neighborhood. We want and have always wanted a homestead. A farmette. A little piece of the agrarian heaven. So, that is where we are. We hurried up to stand still. We are getting our lives in order to step into something greater. It may take six months to a year but we set ourselves upon this road to our dream. Where will it be? Good question. That will make itself apparent as we begin the search in a few months.

The homeschooling and more babies will happen in the future or they won't. My kids are so fortunate to be in a elementary school that promotes all that I think is important. And when they fail to do something I think is important  then we do it at home. One part public school and two parts mama-school. As far as babies go- I will leave that door open and see what God wants of us. 

Long story short, I stopped feeling sorry for myself and I have a lot to say and share with the larger blogging community. But with that comes the realization that one thing I do not have time for anymore is comparing and worrying where we are supposed to as compared to everyone else. My daughter recently proposed that we live a screen-free summer. A summer with limited use of screens in our home. I couldn't believe it. Why didn't I think of that? She is pretty darn smart for an eight year old girl who has limited use of screens as it is. I have been deciding what/how I want to use my time on the internet. I love to share stories, ideas, writing, and thoughts on my blog. I also love looking at lovely pictures on Instagram. So, that is where I will dedicate allotted screen time this summer. I said good-bye to Facebook. I am not sure how much I will miss it. I have a feeling it won't be very much. 

Here we are. Back into blogging. How have you been? 

Monday, January 02, 2017

Resolutions in 2017

:: Resolutions in 2017 ::

                       The new year is finally here after a roller coaster of a year for many including myself. The past year in many respects has felt like round after round of whirling drama, anger, sadness, and general meanness in our country. I know my soul is weary from the past year for many reasons. I know the souls of family  and friends are tired from their own trials and tribulations. It was a year of difficulties for many but I cannot help but think that this past year may have made me stronger in my soul and mind. The tough situations that I face are brought to me to make me stronger. My husband uses the phrase "adapt and overcome". Adapt to the changes in my home and life by growing in who I am as an individual. And then, overcome the fears and difficulties of the past year so that this year can be used for doing good in my home, community, and world. 

I love the new year. I love the freshness of beginning again and trying to be a better version of myself than last year. I love making resolutions and seeing if throughout this new year I can achieve my goals. I love making a list of little projects and milestones I hope to achieve. Each year on this earth is a gift that I am given and I do not want to squander that gift to achieve my goals for the new year. I love to make and share my resolutions for the year as it will hold me accountable. 

My 5 Resolutions for 2017: 

Resolution #1: find our home.

This year will be our biggest year yet. The prospect of buying a home is around the corner and that comes with very big decisions to be made. Decisions about where to buy, what to buy, and the schooling of the children. We thought that last year would be the year and it just wasn't the right time. It was hard to accept the fact that we just were not finding the right home for our family especially when everyone you know owns a home. It took me a while to realize that we are not like anyone we know in our small town. We were a newly separated military family who has lived in many places and moved many times. We had moved and made sacrifices in our life that many don't know anything about.  So, this year I am taking off the comparison "glasses" and not worry about keeping up with everyone else. The right home is out there and we will find it. 

Resolution #2: time in mediation and prayer. 

It goes without saying that I do not spend as much time as I would like just sitting and being present in my body and mind. I do not sit down and really pray to God as much as I would like. I do not meditate on life as much as I would like. I will do more of this in the new year because when it does happen I walk away from it feeling refreshed and renewed. A very cheap way to give my soul a facelift. 

Resolutions # 3 through 5: Read, Create, and Travel

Read more books. 
Write on this blog. 
Share my talents and work with others. 
Get stuff made. 
Get writing published. 
Go see the country ( I would say the world but with three children we might just stick to the country for the next couple years). 

I like to choose a word or words to carry me through the year. This year I chose "Love".

A pure, unbiased, unflinching love for others. The kind that carries those who stumble and embolden those who waiver. The kind that gives you courage and ignites your heart. Choosing to love others instead of fearing or disliking them. The love that you have to sometimes work at to get right.